From My Diary
Places to see in London – North
Wallace Collection, Royal Academy of Art, Science Museum, Harrods, Westminster Cathedral, Buckingham Palace, Tate Britain, Westminster Abbey/Houses of Parliament, National Gallery, National Portrait Gallery, Courtauld Gallery, St Paul’s Cathedral, Guildhall, Smithfield Market/the Barbican Centre, Brick Lane, Petticoat Lane Market, Tower of London, the Monument
Places to see in London – Southbank
Tate Modern, London Dungeon, Borough Market, Hay’s Galleria, Design Museum, Fashion & Textiles Museum, Flower Market, Garden Museum, Florence Nightingale Museum, Country Hall Gallery
Things that have made me smile
Spring flowers and buds on the trees, Little glittery cobbled ‘mews’, Watching videos from home, Irregular Choice shoes, Nun joke, Curious squirrel, Seeing my Godparents, Little boy on bus with pretty eyes, A gallery of small things, Little dog sneezing, ear bud sculpture, little places
Things which have made me sad
No one to hug, buses, Job interview – no one to ask how it went, spending too much money, walking past cafes wanting to go in but shouldn’t, worrying, hunger, a friend, no milk, no sugar, no bread, no food, too big, too much, too noisy, too crowded, too fast, too smelly, too hurtful, too ignorant, uncertainty, no one thanks bus drivers in London
Sometimes I get down. I have a pattern where I get used to something, somewhere, and I begin to enjoy seeing the sights and having something solid, and then I will see or hear something, or I have to move, and I feel out of my depth, out of my comfort zone, and totally alone. There are things which help me, my emails and facebook most importantly, and seeing or talking to people. Some days, though, I found that I didn’t talk to anyone until late afternoon, usually it would be ‘That’s £4.95, thanks’ or something similar.
I wrote in my diary/sketch book “People here call you ‘fresh’ if you’ve just arrived. Like being here toughens you up, makes you drink and smoke. Why do people want to fit in so much that everyone does this?” In London I went through being down, then feeling good and then feeling down again. Mainly I was adjusting to being by myself all of the time.
People keep calling me brave, to have come all this way. It wasn’t bravery. I just didn’t think about it. I was like, yeah I’ve stayed at home by myself for a week or two, and I’m a pretty independent person, I don’t mind going places by myself. That is nothing to what it is like being on the other side of the planet to everything I am familiar with. I wrote at the time, “I can’t believe how much I took for granted! It’s so good I’ve done this now, I realize now that you have to have people who love you around you. Otherwise the world is cold and unfriendly.”
That is one of the lessons I have learnt; anywhere you are can be ‘home’, if you are surrounded by those who you love and who love you.
Love love
Your crazy friend xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxox
